Regrets, I've had a few

Talking to a friend the other day, we were discussing not ever having to look back and say, "I wish I had done that differently" or "I regret ever doing that." And I've always prided myself on not ever having to say I wish I hadn't done that, or I wonder what life would be like if only I had done that.

With that being said, there are a few things I regret having done. What was I thinking when I did them? I couldn't tell you. But much like Chunk in "The Goonies," once you start thinking about it, it all just comes flooding out.

I regret flinging Darrell Ryder's lunch box against a tree when I was in kindergarten and splitting it in half. His Cheetos went everywhere. But then again, he deserved it for bullying me everyday.

I regret pushing the door open on this kid named Jonathan while he was using the bathroom so that everyone could see him. I have no idea why I did that now. Maybe that's why I live in fear that someone will do that to me one day in a public restroom.

I regret turning the exit sign around at the Aquarium of the Americas in New Orleans while on a field trip in the sixth grade. I regret it because a group of Asian tourists saw the sign and went completely back through the Aquarium looking for the exit.

I regret the first girlfriend I ever had. Not because she outweighed me by 200 pounds or because everyone called her "The Mighty Ukla," but because she was mean and made me watch that "Doors" movie with Val Kilmer everytime we hung out.

I guess that's pretty much it. I regret that this entry wasn't more uplifting.